Slightly more calm

After yesterday's violent outburst of anger and rudeness, I feel I must apologise to my dear readers. So here you go - sorry, dear readers, for forcing my invective at you by means of my normally genteel blog.

It has raised some concern in me, that I've changed rather more than I intended and am overall a more stressful person than I used to be. Worries appear to be mounting in my life that, objectively, arent worries but niggles that I blow out of all proportion and over-react to. I seem to have lost my golden mean of responsiveness, probably because I havent been meditating for a long while. It's now just over three years since I had a very nice moment of calm in meditating, something I've been trying to get back to all this while. Sitting has been disintegrated from my life and I've been distracting myself from doing it with all kinds of things. The mind is tricksy, no? I've very successfully convinced myself I have no time to sit, whereas actually I have tonnes of time just disinclination to do so. My snake, cock and pig are all raring at the moment! Evidence, see yesterday. Time for even a small stop and a rake of the stones.

Anyhow, I've run out of steam....time for a bath, and then a little bit of greek!